So I recently was sent a blog link by my sister for her and her new little family. It made me miss my old blog that I had in college. So I tried to get onto my old blog...succeeded once, and now it won't let me on again. Once I was on there the first time successfully, I realized they changed the way that you post a blog and I couldn't figure it out....I have been realizing a lot lately that I don't know nearly as much about things that you can use computers for than I should...kinda feel like my parents (sigh). So here's to me learning more!
A couple of weeks ago at small group we were discussing honoring the sabbath. Of course I have heard this a million times before, but never in this context. They dared introduce the idea to me that God gave us the sabbath cause he knew that he would create us to need rest...and by need I mean vital...like breathing oxygen. So we were challenged...to each come up with a period of rest in our week to just rejuvenate. Now this time of rejuvenation didn't mean taking a break from my homework in order to get more "things" done around the house...it meant rest and don't feel guilty....so we had to decide what "rest" meant to us...did it mean a nap? silence? pedicure? reading?....for me it meant a shopping trip, frappachino, and a bookstore visit. I am deciding what future rest might mean: I love facials, pedicures, girls coffee shop trips, hiking, photography (me a camera and the outdoors), scrapbooking, reading, watching a girlie movie...sometimes I have been known to buy a fashion magazine, rent a girl movie, and give my own self a pedicure(its cheaper if you do it yourself:) Regardless its really made me think about doing what "I want" and not feeling bad about it. Ever since I got married its been really hard to learn who I am in the whole thing. Dave never demands much of me at all, but i think I got stuck in being Betty Crocker perfect wife for awhile, and am just now realizing that its still me...Bridget, just a different last name and a partner at my side.
Sorry I am rambling, but thats what I like about blogs...its mine...and I can write whatever the heck I want to.
This whole taking time for myself has even made me want to do things I have never let myself do....like horseback riding. My whole life I have wanted to take lessons, and now I learn that some stables lease horses....oh how I would love to do that! It's kinda pricey, but I am looking for good deals. Another thing I recently learned of at the bookstore was the concept of digital scrapbooking...the thought never even crossed my mind and now I am intrigued. I will make it my goal to learn more about this amazing new thought.
On an even more encouraging note, I purchased a book this week about conquering my thoughts. You may think this sounds quite ridiculous, but not to one who struggles with it. My thoughts all to often, in fact most of the time rule my mind (well duh Bridget whats our mind made of!), however, my thoughts are not healthy ones, I am constantly hard on myself, and forever failing in my own mind of others expectations that do not even exist. I finally have hope to know that these thoughts satan wants me to think about myself so that I will constantly feel like a failure...there is freedom from each and everyone of them...and the best part...I just have to lean more on my Savior. It will come with time...practice...and patience, but the most exciting part is finally....I understand what i have struggled with for so long. Well enough for today. I need to go to bed.
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